How do you motivate yourself when no one else believes in you? – Well, Mike, I can give you two answers. One is the politically correct one, one is the fucking truth. Depends on which one you want to hear. I’ll give you both, actually. The politically correct answer is, well, you’ve got to just hustle, you gotta just put your head down and you gotta know your goal, know where you’re going. You hear these things a lot. Here’s the truth. That if you need someone to motivate you, you’re not that motivated.
What I notice is high-performance people, we are self-motivated. There are a lot of people, they’re looking for their family. And they use that as an excuse, so you know, my wife, my husband, they don’t support me. My parents don’t support me. My kids don’t support me. Or my friends don’t support me. Guess what? Do not expect their support.
The air is thin at the top. That’s just the path. That when you are becoming more successful, that’s the biggest thing that holds most people back. It’s not the how-to, it’s not the know what, it’s not don’t know what to do, it’s not the business idea, it’s the fact that they cannot operate at the same time not having to get permission from the people around them. That they wish, how come, don’t you know I’m doing this for you? How come you guys don’t support me? How come my family don’t support me? How come they don’t understand? I don’t get it, I want to make more money, I want to be more successful, to better their lives.
How come they don’t understand? Guess what, most of the time, they will never understand. You’re expecting something that won’t happen. That’s what’s holding you back. You’re expecting them to give you permission. Yeah, go for it, they cheer you up. No. No, the question is why don’t they support you? It’s very simple. It’s very, very simple. I go through this whole thing, exactly in my own life. First of all, they don’t understand. Because most of us, we grew up in the miseducational system. Where it’s teaching you to behave a certain way.
Go to school, get good grades, and walk this path. Get a degree, get a job, work till you’re 65. Marry, have kids, get a big mortgage. That’s your life. Anything that deviates from that, anything that’s not the traditional path, that is stupid. That is dangerous. That is wrong. You shouldn’t do that, you should do this. So the minute you want to walk a different path, the people around you, your loved ones, they feel like you are so weird. How come you can’t do what everybody else, just be normal. Just settle. Don’t take risks. Play safe. Get a safe, secure job. And the more you deviate from that traditional path, the more they feel like, the bigger the distance between you and them. They’re afraid to lose you.
They’re afraid that to lose, they’re afraid that you’ll leave them behind. That’s why you don’t have the support. And all your buddies, all your friends, do you really think they want you to be mega-successful? To live their dream life? To travel, live in that beautiful home, to drive that car that they could never afford? Do you really think that they want you to be that successful while they’re living paycheck to paycheck? Hell fucking no. They might say, oh yeah, we cheer for you congratulations man, good for you. Deep down, enviousness, jealousy, lower self. It’s human nature. So what I’m saying, is don’t even expect it.
You’re wasting your time. You do what you think is right, you do what you believe is right. You walk your own path. They might see it, they might not see it, I’m not expecting them to see it. This is my life, it’s not their life. I do what I know I need to do, so if you need someone to motivate you, you’re not going to be successful. I, me, Dan Lok, I don’t need anyone to motivate me. I don’t even need people to understand me. I understand me, I motivate me. You’re waiting for someone to motivate, how come they don’t support me, how can I motivate. You can’t even get yourself to get off the fucking bed and wake up and do what it takes, and you want to be successful? Do you want to be better than everybody else? You want to develop that skill? Not going to happen. Just not going to happen. You need to be self-motivated. Look across any industry, sports, entertainment, business. Anyone who’s achieved excellence, you don’t need to motivate them. Because they demand more from themselves than anybody else could. I demand more from myself than anybody else could. Do you demand more from yourself, than anybody else could? So don’t wait. Do it, and just do it.